Life Is Like

LIFE IS LIKE…SEPTEMBER 11^TH

“Where Were You (When The World Stopped Turning)”.  Country star Alan Jackson put so eloquently into words the most horrific event that, God willing, we will ever experience in our lifetime.

Before I continue on this subject, I feel it is necessary for a little background information about myself before I continue.

For those of you that may not know me.  I was diagnosed with Major Depression shortly after marrying Joe 20 years ago, as much as I’d love to say he is to blame, looking back it had been something that I had been dealing with since my mid teens.

Since my initial diagnosis (like that wasn’t enough) I’ve had several more mental health diagnoses; anxiety & stress issues and most recently, Bipolar II.

Upon the initial diagnosis 20 years ago at the Mayo Clinic, I was told the stress was too much and that I should quit my job or it would get worse.  In denial, I ignored my Doctor’s advice. 

In 2000 I was on literally more than a half a dozen depression and anxiety medications (this after trying a dozen other ones that didn’t work). My Doctor said the next step would be major tranquilizers as I was seeing and hearing things. My depression was definitely too far out of control.

In January she mentioned that it would be in my best interest to quit my job (I had been employed as a Baraga County Deputy County Clerk for 13 years).  She also said she would support, and do all she could do, to get me on Social Security disability due to multiple mental health problems.  A month later I handed in my resignation effective March 1^st.  As it turned out I still couldn’t hang in there until March, I had to take several weeks of sick and vacation time.

Mentally it was one of the best decisions that I have ever made.  With no other alternative and with the full support of Joe I left a well paying job that would leave us financially devastated.  It was truly necessary for my mental health and I yet felt that my job somehow defined who I was.

Prior to all of this, in seven months after my father passed away in January of 1996, I was admitted into the MGH Impatient Stress and Depression Unit.  It was far from a vacation, let me tell you, but was absolutely necessary at the time.

I don’t recall exactly how long I stayed there, but while there my medications were adjusted and I was able to hold on to “my sanity” until 2000.

Finally back to September 11^th.

As Joe was leaving for work that day there was late breaking news that a plane had hit tower number #1.  He stayed glued in front of the television horrified at the scene as it was unfolding. 

Having CRS – Can’t Remember Shit, I’m not exactly sure when I awoke but I immediately called Joe at work and the first words out of my mouth (expletive deleted) were, “What the hell is going on?”

In shock I don’t remember what exactly what he said except I asked him why he didn’t wake me.  Looking back he made the right decision not to, knowing my mental state and that I would learn about it soon enough.  After getting off the phone with him, I sat down and continued to watch in horror along with the rest of the world.  To me, one of the best descriptions of a hero is a person that runs into danger as everyone else is running away.

Rightfully so, the news continued to cover the unfolding events.  As they continued to show the coverage day after day, I couldn’t take it any longer and tried to get the images out of my mind and watched whatever comedy we had available.

I realize that I have been focusing mainly in New York, knowing that other cities were affected.  When I refer to September 11^th, I mean everywhere, every city and every plane that caused destruction.

Many, if not everyone asked and continue to ask, why it happened.  Where was God?  Why didn’t He stop it? 

For those questions I can only tell you what I believe and that is simply, He was there.

In the stories of every survivor.

For example

How normally there would have been more people in the twin towers at that time in the morning, saving countless people.

Hearing every prayer said all around the world.

Consoling everyone that lost a loved one and those that didn’t know if their family member had been in the tower or not.

Giving strength to the hero’s, both the ones doing their job and those that stepped up to do whatever they could do.

He was there with his arms wide open for all of those that were killed, bringing them to Heaven.

He was also in Heaven shedding tears.  We saw the debris of buildings, planes, the smoke, ash and papers flying around in the sky.  His tears were there also, even if we couldn’t see them.

I urge you to continue to pray for all of those still suffering with their individual issues as a result of that day.

I also urge you to remember that in every race there are good people and bad ones as well.  Hate breeds hate.  That is not what this country needs!

Scary times still continue.  Unfortunately that is a reality, but if there is anything we can do is to try look at the best in people.

Upon every ones death, we will be held accountable for our lives.  This is His job, not ours.

Geography is definitely not one of my strong suits.  I still can’t point out Iraq on a map (I can’t spell either so I’m not going to bother with the other countries).  But what I do know is our servicemen and women would rather be home with all the comforts it brings, than stationed away.

It doesn’t matter if you agree with the war or not, they, along with their families, are making huge sacrifices to keep America safe for each and everyone of us.  I urge you to pray and support them.  If you are unable to give financial support, a simple (and free) thank you to those families would be appreciated.

If you happen to see our servicemen and women in the armed forces, thank them for their service.

To sum this up.  God bless and protect America and all of us lucky enough to call Her home.

Katy Manning Schutte

Please Note:  This is my first post to the blog and I would like to include the following even though it truly has no place in this September 11th article.

I want to credit my beloved husband Joe.  His creative writing style of being able to work humor in everything he writes.  I Hope that during the 10 years of reading and being the 1^st editor of his column that some of his creativity has worn-off on me.  If not, blame him, I will.

I also want to say that I honestly believe that I would not still be alive if not for his unwavering support and love.  He has gone through more than you can ever image with my ongoing mental illnesses and numerous other major issues in my life.  He has always stayed by my side and keeps me and my mental health as his #1 priority.

With everything I have, and unfortunately continue to, put him through he is still with me.  It is my firm belief that no other man on the face of this planet would have stayed with me this long.

I pray for him (and would appreciate your prayers as well) both in thanks and also the heavy burden that he continues to carry.

Thank you for reading this article and I promise that they are not all gushy about Joe!

I like to consider my Life Is Like… articles everyday things and how God works into them.

As a teaser, upcoming ones include:

Life Is Like…

    Poo (yes, poo)

    An Anti-Virus

    Fingernails…Not A Box Of Chocolates

    A Septic Tank

    A Hot Flash

Again, thanks for reading and remember, if you don’t like my writing style, blame Joe!

Katy